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Channel: The Leila Texts
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Article 24

Aww this is sweet. I really should have helped this person find a just-right birthday gift for Mona.

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Article 23

Th joke is, he's not actually a captain. He's actually a first lieutenant.

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Article 22

Here's a hint: her phone number starts with "971."

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Article 21

"You guys will probably have a lot in common. You know, because you all have spouses."

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Article 20

Trick question: it's tie dye! Therefore it is all the colors of the rainbow.

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Article 19

To all of you who are in your last days of school: hooray! What are your summer plans?

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Article 18

Gonna go out on a limb here and say that Leila sounds like a bit of a fuckup.

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Article 17

Murrieta Valley is a school district in California. If their website is to be believed, the school Leila's playing is going to be hard to beat. Their website also notes that they are good at spelling...

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Article 16

It's St. Mary's Assyrian Church, actually. In Tarzana, California. But what are they voting on? That's the real question. Also, have any of you ever actually been to Tarzana, California?

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Article 15

908 leads an extremely healthy lifestyle.

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Article 14

So where do we think Leila works that's fast at night but not during the day? I keep coming back to "24-hour strip club," but that may just be the optimist in me.

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Article 13

What book are Leila and 315 reading?Options:50 Shades of GreyBridge to Terebithia

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Article 12

Actually, I just don't want to talk to her anymore. But I didn't have the heart to tell her that.

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Article 11

I had Grand Jury duty two years ago. I saw a LOT of ADAs an heard about a LOT of robberies. Grand Jury is alternately incredibly boring and incredibly depressing, and it's hard to say which part is...

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Article 10

Happy Belmont Stakes day! Whom are YOU betting on?

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Article 9

This series of texts makes me feel pretty darn bad for Eric's parents.

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Article 8

Portion control is great and all, but counting pieces of pasta is taking dieting to the next level.

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Article 7

Came home from a week out of the country to this text message. Sure thing, guy.

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Article 6

Sure I'll help color your hair. I'll help color it LIKE THIS:

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Article 5

And just like this, another middle-school romance collapses.

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